How Over Are You?

Adulthood / regrettably factual

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Four age-adjusted ranks. These are descriptive benchmarks from populations with different statistical units, averaged into an entertainment index.

How old are you? 01 / 05

Whole years, 18–100. We match each source’s published age band.

Have you ever been married? 02 / 05

Yes No

Compared with people your age. Current marital status is not the question.

Does your household own its home? 03 / 05

Yes No

Compared with occupied households by householder age. Mortgages still count as owning.

Does your household have a vehicle available? 04 / 05

Yes No

Compared with occupied households by householder age. Available, not necessarily owned outright.

Household savings + investments 05 / 05

Cash, checking, savings, investments, and retirement accounts before subtracting debt. Enter 0 if none. Benchmarked in June 2026 dollars against families by reference-person age.

Dating discourse / hostile peer review

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Version-one data limit: adults ages 18–49.

This is a satire model, not a desirability percentile or prediction. Population percentiles and prevalence are shown separately from the points Plausibly Deniable decided to award.

Which set of internet standards should judge you? 01

Men’s rulesAge 20% · height 30% · income 30% · home 10% · experience 10% Women’s rulesAge 50% · BMI model 50%. Height is used only to calculate BMI.

How old are you? 02

Whole years, 18–49. This limit comes from the available sexual-experience benchmark.

Height 03

Enter a total height from 4′0″ to 8′0″.